Alzheimers - Single Parent Pessimist https://singleparentpessimist.co.uk Experiences of a Single Mum Attempting to Find a Positive Approach to Life Mon, 29 Mar 2021 10:28:54 +0000 en-GB hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=6.4.4 https://singleparentpessimist.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/cropped-29366232_826313014243537_8143307492714086400_o-1.jpg Alzheimers - Single Parent Pessimist https://singleparentpessimist.co.uk 32 32 Dementia-Friendly Christmas Gifts https://singleparentpessimist.co.uk/dementiagiftideas/ https://singleparentpessimist.co.uk/dementiagiftideas/#comments Wed, 07 Dec 2016 21:29:00 +0000 http://test.singleparentpessimist.co.uk/2016/12/07/dementiagiftideas/ Christmas gifts are going to be more difficult this year. As my grandmother's Alzheimer's progresses, it's becoming increasingly harder to find gifts that she will enjoy.

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6 Things I’ve Learnt About Caring: Advice To New Carers https://singleparentpessimist.co.uk/6tipsforcarers/ https://singleparentpessimist.co.uk/6tipsforcarers/#respond Mon, 08 Aug 2016 08:07:00 +0000 http://test.singleparentpessimist.co.uk/2016/08/08/6tipsforcarers/ I became a carer for my mum when I was 12 years old, and since moving out in my early twenties I still keep a close eye, as her needs have increased. I also care for my nan, though not as much because the demands of being a single parent to a young child tends to take up the majority of my time, alongside paid work of course. So whilst I’m not a full time carer, I still have experience in caring for people with physical and mental health needs, and have learnt a lot of the years. I hope this is helpful to anyone starting out in caring for someone, and if you know any other great tips please add them to the comment section below. 6 Things I’ve Learnt About Caring: Advice To New Carers 1. Work Out What They Want and Need From You It can be quite a shock to go from being self-sufficient to suddenly needing someone to help you with basic tasks. It can affect people’s pride and their self-esteem, particularly if you are receiving care from your own children or grandchildren after spending years being the carer for them. So with this in mind it’s important to establish with them what they can still do and what they need help with. Don’t just automatically do everything for them because if they can still do certain things they will want to continue to do so to maintain some independence. Sure it may take them double the time to wash the dishes than it takes you, but nothing beats the feeling for them that they can still do it themselves. If they’re starting to find some things harder to do, gently ask if they want you to take over. There may be some things that they can no longer do but feel they can. When this happens it can be so frustrating for you to watch especially when they reject your help. Start by trying to distract them by asking them to do something they can actually do (why don’t you make us a cuppa while I finish this off?) but if that doesn’t work you need to calmly, but firmly ask them to stop, particularly if you feel they may hurt themselves otherwise. It’s tough when there’s things they don’t think they need help with which they actually do. You can get advice from places such as Age UK or Carers UK if you are struggling to find ways to work with your loved one. 2. Home Adaptations For many conditions there can be adaptations made to the house which can help immensely. This can even be small things such as adding a little hand rail to side of the bath or the bed so they can get up and down without your help.  It can include adding hand rails to the garden, having adjustable beds and chairs and also things like bath seats and raised toilet seats. We contacted adult social services for both my nan and mum and booked an occupational therapist to come out to look at what adaptations would help them. Some adaptations they will even do for free, and those that are not within their budgets they can still advise what would be useful and you can then buy them from various shops and online companies. 3. Hobbies Hobbies are vital for everyone. We all need mental and physical stimulation to maintain good mental health, mood and general health.  For people with physical or mental health issues hobbies can be even more vital. They keep the mind active, which is something I’ve been desperate for my nan to maintain since her diagnosis with Alzheimer’s last year.  Hobbies Are Vital Finding hobbies for my nan has been difficult as her condition has deteriorated, but we have found some activities from Active Minds who specialise in activities, games, puzzles and exercises to help people with Dementia. Activities include animal bingo, DVDs and reminiscence books. My favourite is the aquapaint activity which is a reusable painting activity where only water is used. Once the water dries the image fade and can be used again and my nan won’t have to worry about trying to draw the initial shapes and no paint can be spilt. 4. Maintain Their Mobility To Maintain Their Independence My mum is still quite young but at the end of last year we nearly lost her and the effects of the organ failure led to her finding it difficult to walk even now.  This has been hard for her because it has cut off a lot of her independence; Being stuck at home or having to be escorted by your children everywhere must really do something to your pride. She felt quite isolated during this time so began to look at ways to gain some of her independence back. Aids For Mobility Are So Useful We looked into mobility scooters and managed to find one she felt comfortable with. Betterlife have a great range online and in their stores, with each model having different functions depending on the person’s needs.  It’s lovely to see how much happier she is now this is in her life because she can pop to the shops when she’s run out of milk rather than waiting for one of us to do it. She can go to the doctors and chemist without being escorted, and she can pick up Curly from school which is something she missed hugely.    It also means if we have family days out that involve a lot of walking she has it to use when she gets tired. She can walk with a stick but not for long periods. It’s also something she can use in the icy, wet weather as sticks tend to lose their grip in these conditions.  5. Socialising Being home all day everyday is not good for anyone. It may be difficult to get them out and about as it can take a lot of planning and preparation, but it is so […]

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Finding Ways To Talk To People With Dementia https://singleparentpessimist.co.uk/dementiacards/ https://singleparentpessimist.co.uk/dementiacards/#comments Sun, 03 Apr 2016 11:06:00 +0000 http://test.singleparentpessimist.co.uk/2016/04/03/dementiacards/ Now that my nan’s getting into the more severe stages of Alzheimer’s I’m noticing it’s becoming more difficult to hold a conversation with her. This is normal for those with Dementia because the disease shuts down parts of the brain bit by bit so communication and speech can be affected hugely. My nan is forgetting a lot of recent events and can become frustrated when she can’t find the right words to describe something. More recently she is finding it hard to follow the flow of a conversation and I find myself sitting there not knowing what to talk about so I’ve started to look at ways I can help her. Some of the NRS Conversation Cards I’ve been trying to find ways to engage with my nan and I was told there are conversation cards which have been created by NRS Healthcare to help start conversations with older people. NRS Healthcare are trying to raise awareness for the issue of loneliness for older people, which seems to be something that’s increasing in this country and personally I hate the thought that one day I may be stuck at home day in day out with not one single visitor. Whilst these cards are designed to encourage people to talk to older people in general, they are also relevant for those with dementia. They include questions about the person’s past which is something that I have completely forgotten about asking nan. Whilst her short term memory is failing my nan can still remember vivid details about her childhood and early adult life so these cards have given me some hope. It’s also a bonus that the cards are free so all I needed to do was download them and print them off. This morning I was catching up on some episodes of Neighbours and noticed they are featuring dementia. Doug’s granddaughter was filming him talking about his memories of her birth and it struck me that I could use these cards and film my nan. She remembers so many things about my childhood and my mother’s and I would hate to think that soon she will forget all this so I want to capture it so I can keep it forever. If you know of any other effective ways to talk to people with dementia, please comment below as this is something so close to my heart and I imagine it’s the same for so many of my readers too. Follow me on Instagram, Twitter, Pinterest or Facebook.

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Hobbies For Those With Dementia https://singleparentpessimist.co.uk/activitiesfordementia/ https://singleparentpessimist.co.uk/activitiesfordementia/#comments Tue, 29 Mar 2016 20:04:00 +0000 http://test.singleparentpessimist.co.uk/2016/03/29/activitiesfordementia/ As you’re aware my nan has Dementia in the form of Alzheimer’s and every now and then I write about how it’s affecting her (as well as me). In recent weeks my nan has started to deteriorate particularly in the evenings, which is known as sun downing. She starts to become very confused, disorientated and at times quite distressed or angry in the evenings which is common for many with dementia. Dementia can cause anxiety and depression for the person suffering from it as the disease affects their ability to do so many things from structuring a sentence, making a cup of tea to even walking and being able to see things in 3D. Dementia is such an isolating and lonely condition for the sufferer and if I can find things that will help my nan’s brain to deteriorate even slightly slower than I will take that chance.  Some studies have shown that those with Dementia who participate in mentally stimulating activities can have up to a 15% slower cognitive decline than those who don’t. Thankfully there are still parts of the day when she is more like the nan I remember, where she can engage in conversation and appear happy. During these precious moments which are sadly reducing, I’ve recently found out that there are various activities I could do with her to help keep her mind stimulated. Active Minds are a company that specialise in activities, games, puzzles and exercises to help people who have Dementia. They have worked with Dementia specialists and carers to create their products, which include art activities, animal bingo, DVDs and reminiscence books. My favourite is the aquapaint activity which is a reusable painting activity where only water is used. Once the water dries the image fade and can be used again and my nan won’t have to worry about trying to draw the initial shapes and no paint can be spilled. Aquapaint I love that there’s a range of activities which are designed to be entertaining whilst doing the crucial thing of helping maintain their cognitive function. Some of the activities like the jigsaws and the bingo are things I can do with my nan. Chunk can even get involved so it seems more like a family game and he still gets to do fun things with his great grandmother and create lovely memories to look back upon. This would appeal to my nan as she is a very proud woman and would hate to think that she was doing an activity specifically for Dementia. What I like most is that there are so many different activities meaning we have always got something to try as she progresses through the various stages of Dementia and it’s all things she can do in the comfort of her own home. If you have any suggestions of things I can try with nan, please comment below! Follow me on Instagram, Twitter, Pinterest or Facebook

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Nan 1 – Alzheimer’s 0 https://singleparentpessimist.co.uk/ihatealzheimers/ https://singleparentpessimist.co.uk/ihatealzheimers/#comments Sat, 30 Jan 2016 12:23:00 +0000 http://test.singleparentpessimist.co.uk/2016/01/30/ihatealzheimers/ Yesterday was a good day for my nan and I cannot tell you how grateful I am that I chose that day to visit her. Things seem to have deteriorated a lot since her diagnosis a few months ago to the point where she is accepting a lot more help (thankfully) but she is also fast becoming a shell of the nan I used to know and adore. Some days she struggles to even form a sentence and the hardest part is when she looks at me and her eyes look glazed and empty. It hurts to write these words as I feel like my nan is slipping away from me and there’s nothing I can do to help her come back. She no longer recognises herself in the mirror and at times I can see how frustrated she must be feeling as she cannot do some of the things she has always loved such as read novels and knit. I treasure the knitted jumpers and mittens she made for Chunk before he was born, as sadly these will be the last things she will ever have made for me. There’s been some really difficult times recently which have exacerbated my awareness of how much I of my nan I have already lost. Things have been pretty awful with my mother’s health, my own health and my sister no longer wants me in her life. At times like this I’ve always turned to my nan as a strong shoulder to lean on and I’ve always valued her advice and wisdom. So during this last couple of weeks when I’ve automatically reached for the phone I’ve had to stop myself and I’ve realised I have to deal with this on my own, and it bloody sucks. My mum is too unwell to deal with me dumping my fears and sadness onto her so I literally have no one. But when I start to feel low and sorry for myself I kick myself back into shape by reminding myself that nan is feeling the loneliest and most isolated she has ever felt with this cruel, cruel disease. She has nobody to turn to because she cannot even get the words out to ask for help or describe how it feels. She has lost her three-dimensional sight so finds it hard to walk around the house and even pick up a drink. I’ve lost the rock who listened to me day in, day out for months on end each time I had a bout of unipolar depression which has been on and off since I was 15 years old. I’ve lost the lady who would be able to tell me how to revive the flowers I killed or how to help my little boy when he would have various ailments. I’ve lost my nan who would buy me a magazine and chocolate every weekend as a child, and who continued to even when I was 25 years old. I’ve lost my nanny, my one and only nanny and it hurts so much. So yesterday was a beautiful blessing where I got to have a treasured hour of my nan back, who told me what the weather was like, who conversed with me about the family and who played with Chunk. I looked into her eyes and it was my nan and I want to treasure that small moment of time forever. Don’t ever take your grandparents for granted. Even at 31 years old I still want and need my nan and I always will. Sponsor my SkyDive for Alzheimer’s here. Follow me on Instagram, Twitter, Pinterest or Facebook

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Sponsor My Skydive for Alzheimer’s! https://singleparentpessimist.co.uk/alzheimerskydive/ https://singleparentpessimist.co.uk/alzheimerskydive/#respond Sun, 17 Jan 2016 21:24:00 +0000 http://test.singleparentpessimist.co.uk/2016/01/17/alzheimerskydive/ Me and My Nan Late 2015 my amazing grandmother, Margaret Hammond, was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s, which is a very cruel form of Dementia and known as ‘The Long Goodbye’ for a good reason. Once diagnosed unfortunately no support has been offered to inform my family of what to expect or how to help support my nan through this condition, which I find absolutely disgusting as I assumed the UK would have ample services to support the patient and their caregivers as it is a physically and mentally exhausting disease for all involved.  The Alzheimer’s Society are campaigning for the government to put more support in place and they also offer advice to families going through this and they fund research to try to cure this horrific disease, so please donate as much as possible. Watching my nan deteriorate is one of the most painful things I’ve ever gone through which is why I feel so passionately about this cause. I have decided to do the scariest thing I could think of, because my nan is going through the scariest, most isolating time of her life and whilst I cannot get inside her mind to help her, I want to try to do something that will scare me and hopefully raise money in the hopes less people will have to suffer the way she currently is.  In order to get to do the skydive I need to raise a minimum of £395 though, so please donate anything you can and don’t forget to share the link to your friends and family in case they want to help too. My fundraising page can be found here , THANK YOU! You can also help by donating other things to The Alzheimer’s Society including: 1. Old Jewellery 2. Foreign coins 3. Used inkjet cartridges4. Old computers5. Old cars If you have any unwanted or broken jewellery we can recycle it and raise much needed funds. Do you have unwanted foreign coins lying around? Why not donate them to us. We can recycle your old inkjet cartridges for money, rather than them being sent to landfill. Recycling your unwanted computer is an easy way to raise money, and is environmentally-friendly too. A great way to get rid of an unwanted car and raise money for Alzheimer’s Society. Follow me on Instagram, Twitter, Pinterest or Facebook

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