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    Leaving Emotionally Abusive Relationship and Moving On

    25th July 2017

    It’s been a tough few months, which has included realising I was in an emotionally abusive relationship.

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About Me

Hiya, I'm Claire..

Mum of one, step mum of two and dog mum to Yogi. A veg-growing, food-loving, trashy TV addict. I write openly about life, parenting and my quest to be healthier in mind, body and bank balance. Now a bride to be!

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ad~|gifted GAME TIME We've been kindly sent the n ad~|gifted GAME TIME We've been kindly sent the new game Order Up: Fish Market from @playmonstergamesuk to try, and it's been brilliant to use during half-term! It's for ages 8+ and unlike many games, it's focuses on working together rather than competing against each other. Your team needs to complete as many orders as possible before the time runs out, so teamwork is required to play fish cards while throwing electronic flapping fish to each other. If you succeed, the team becomes the master fishmonger! Get it from @smythstoys as a great Christmas family game (link in product review stories section) ๐Ÿ˜€ #playmonstergames #playmonsteruk #wirepr @wire_pr
(Ad~|gifted) SENSORY OVERLOAD Since being diagnos (Ad~|gifted) SENSORY OVERLOAD Since being diagnosed Autistic ADHD in later life, I've spent a lot of time trying to work out more helpful ways to manage the sensory overwhelm I experience much of the time. I've discovered reducing sensory stimuli whenever the overwhelm starts growing, helps to reduce the many meltdowns I would usually have. To do this, I focus on the 5 senses-light, sound, taste, touch, smell. I like to block light and reduce background noise with Brown noise and eye masks. I've been recently sent Sleep Mask Headphones from @the_zen.life which enables me to do both! The ergonmically designed mask is soft, blocks out all light and has ultra slim headphones. They have Contoured memory foam cups to keep your eyes comfy and they use Bluetooth to connect to your phone so you can enjoy music, meditation or Brown noise. For the other senses, I snuggle into soft fleece gowns or blankets, and have my fave cuppa to smell and taste something comforting. This combo helps calm me down and reset- the hard bit for me is to notice before being overwhelmed to actually put this in action ๐Ÿ˜ฌ๐Ÿ˜… #audhd #autisticadult #adhdadult #sleepmask #sensoryoverwhelm #sensoryprocessingdisorder
This is a throwback from 3 years ago that just cam This is a throwback from 3 years ago that just came up on my feed and it made me reflect. We're both going through the hardest times of our lives right now, to the point that neither of us can help each other as we'd want, because we are still long distance. Time is flying before our eyes and it can feel lonely, especially the more pain you're in within other parts of your lives and that person isnt there to help you feel safe and held. So to see this quote I think was a sign. It came to remind me why we've both still fought for our relationship throughout nearly 6 years of constant battles in our individual lives, that would have broken many other couples a long time ago. When times get tough, you see who your people are. And despite all of the awful things he's going through without any support from those around him, he's still trying to find ways to help me with my pain alongside his own stuff, from afar. We know our worth, as a team, so we keep fighting on and working towards the day we won't be long distance #longdistancerelationship #longdistancelove #couplegoals #audhdcouple #adhdcouple #autisticcouple
WORLD MENTAL HEALTH DAY I can't believe it's that WORLD MENTAL HEALTH DAY I can't believe it's that day again already, and even more surprising is I'm actually writing a post for it. These days i hardly write posts, or even read any, because life is the hardest it's ever been. Caring for my dying mum, dealing with a tricky new workload for my soon to be teen and trying to cope with life whilst in full on burnout mode and having constant fibromyalgia and various other conditons flare-ups is definitely a painful mix. Sprinkle in my audhd and perimenopause and we have a full house ๐Ÿ˜ฌ Just now I managed to take these photos of the northern lights in my garden and it inspired me to post. I'm constantly drained, stressed, depressed and angry at the world these days, but seeing these lights reminded me that it's not all bad all of the time. There's rare moments of funny, calm and even just peace. Look out for those moments and try to find ways to get more of them as each day passes. That's all we can do ๐Ÿ˜” #worldmentalhealthday #worldmentalhealthday2024 #mentalhealthday #mentalhealthmumday #mentalhealthmatters #audhdcommunity #audhd #griefjourney
Ad|~ Do you have kids that love to be creative? Ad|~ Do you have kids that love to be creative? I've been asked to try out the new Fablab Glitter and Glow Party Pack from @playmonsteractivitiesuk It's for anybody age 8+ and has so many things to do in the pack, including nail stickers, nail varnish, hair chalk and glitter tattoos. They can all be glow in the dark by simply charging under natural or artifical sunlight for 2 to 3 hours, and there's even hair bobbles that glow in the dark! The set is great for sleepovers, pamper parties and even for the adults who go clubbing and want some neon glow in the dark looks. @smythstoys @wire_pr
Happy Birthday to my furbaby, who is now older th Happy Birthday to my furbaby, who is now older than me! It's been a really tough year, and it's only going to get tougher as my mum continues to decline and come to the end of her life. I'm exhausted, emotional, numb, stressed and overwhelmed most days and this beautiful boy never fails to make me smile or comfort me He knows when I'm sad and he's right there, literally trying to lick the tears away He always wants to know where I am and follows me around wherever I go, ensuring I'm OK. One day he will leave me, but until then I am thankful for having him in our lives for 7 whole years so far Happy pupday Yogi! #chorkiesofinstagram #chorkie #chorkielove #chorkiemum #chorkiemom #dogsarebetterthanpeople #doglovers
Ad:~ SPIROGRAPH DESIGN We've been trying out the Ad:~ SPIROGRAPH DESIGN We've been trying out the Spirograph Design Set at the start of our summer holidays and had so much fun already! This 30-piece Set comes with a range of pieces to create loads of gorgeous designs. It comes with a handy storage tray, pens, paper and even Spiro-Putty to stick it in place whilst you create your masterpieces! #spirograph #playmonsteruk #wirepr @playmonsteractivitiesuk @smythstoys @wire_pr
I'm losing my mum. At the young age of 59 she's I'm losing my mum. At the young age of 59 she's been told she is now end of life and may only have a few months. It's been a very difficult couple of years leading up to this, and we thought we had more time. The guilt of how I've acted over the last few years due to struggling with life, AuDHD getting worse with perimenopause, my chronic pain, Single parenting and caring for my mum has resulted in me not being a nice daughter to be around most of the time I can't get those years back and fix them. I can't erase them by improving how I am in the future as there is no future now. I'm grateful my mum was my best friend. For all of my life she's been my rock, my foundation and my safe place. She's always been my protector and biggest cheerleader. Only two other people would have helped me through this loss of her, but they both died in recent years. Facing this life alone scares me. Losing the home my mum and I have had for 6 years scares me. The impact of all this for my 12 year old who adores his Nan, scares me. But there's nothing I can do. I've hardly been on socials all year, as the amount of calls, visits, emails and planning for doctors, nurses, tests, hospital, carers, physio, OTs, social workers, therapists as well as actually caring for mum, my son, my dog and dealing with my increasing disabilities have all taken their toll. I have no hobbies apart from watching tv for escapism from the pain and grief. I want to record more @mindvoxpod episodes but I'm exhausted and rarely construct sentences well these days. Anticipatory grief is horrific. No idea why I'm pouring this out, but these days I have nobody to talk to and this open space feels cathartic To all those who've lost their primary attachment parent, I'm finally understanding it's a pain like no other. She brought me into this world and is now leaving me alone in it. She is scared and I dont know how to help her or protect her. She deserved so much more from this life than she got, and I somehow have to find a way to process the anger and pain this leaves me with to create a legacy for her. Any ideas how, feel free to message me #anticipatorygrief #griefjourney
#sandwichgeneration #sandwichcaregiver #sandwichge #sandwichgeneration #sandwichcaregiver #sandwichgenerationlife #audhd #audhdwoman #adhdasf #autisticwomen
Anyone else ruin their clothes from body focused r Anyone else ruin their clothes from body focused repetitive behaviours and/or stimming?! #audhd #audhdwoman #audhder #audhdcommunity #autisticadults #autisticwomen #adhdasf #adhdwomen
BROOKHAVEN FEATURE TANK Ad|~pr gift We've been se BROOKHAVEN FEATURE TANK Ad|~pr gift We've been sent this brand new Brookhaven tank by @jazwares It's got so many great features from lights to ejectable turrets and comes with an exclusive virtual item code! My son loves anything army, as well as Brookhaven so this made his Easter holidays ๐Ÿ’œ Have your kids been enjoying Brookhaven this holiday? #brookhavenrp #jazwares #roblox #brookhaven #unboxing @smythstoys @wire_pr
GIVE SELF COMPASSION THIS MOTHER'S DAY Mother's a GIVE SELF COMPASSION THIS MOTHER'S DAY Mother's and Caregivers Day 2024 is here! It's been an emotional one, as my mum's been incredibly poorly for a few months now, and the constant worry, fear, guilt and anxiety is starting to take its toll on my body and mind. Thanks to @thebeaconeastbourne for interviewing me as part of their Mother's Day round up for their website and socials. The quote they attached to this photo is inspired by recent events for me, as my lack of self compassion has caused me more stress in the long run. My therapist has advised I find ways to be kind to myself, acknowledge my mistakes and pain in kinder ways and take time to take stock. All of this scares me, but the body doesn't lie, and if I want the panic attacks and constant acid reflux to stop, I need to start making changes, so I reshared my quote in case it helps anyone else in a similar position Happy M.D to all the mums, nans and categivers out there, and big love to those wishing they could be with loved ones who are no longer with you ๐Ÿ’š #mothersday2024 #mothersday #sandwichcarer #sandwichcaregiver #sandwichgeneration #parentcarers #chronicillnessawareness #singleparent #loneparenting #singlemumlife
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ยฉ 2023. Claire Jacobs.